The Inner Engineer in us all

Ok so for those of you who don't know that read this I am a mechanical engineer. I have found out that this means several things for me in the stereotypes that are applied as well as the stereotypes that actually fit.

The first stereotype I was told when I decided to become an engineer is that engineers are socially inept. I would have to say that this is partially true for me. I am inept socially usually because my verbal filter is continually in the off position. I have been known to say very questionable things. None of this more evident than a few of the times I have been at strip clubs, or the occasional bikini bar (I don't really understand the principle but it was still entertaining). One of the things I said at the bikini bar, with the "dancer" (I use that term loosely I could have done what she was doing) sitting on my friends lap, "You know I wonder if she realizes it but her stretch marks are really highlighted by this black light" (I still don't know why she didn't hit me she should have). I have many other stripper stories that I will tell later (none of which truly involve me more of just an I was there thing).

Another example of my verbal diarrhea was on a truly terrible date. I was asked my opinion of suicide (on the first date I should have turned and ran then). I said "Anyone who wants to die doesn't attempt suicide they succeed, if you fail you don't really want to do it. I can tell you a 1000 ways to do it and none will fail." She replied "I have attempted suicide 3 times" My mouth was wide open and my brain was frozen. I heard myself say "Maybe the 4th times a charm". The only thing I could have said that possibly was worse would have been "Wow your a failure at everything". I know I'm an asshole.

Another stereotype I have heard applied to engineers is nerdy. Now this one applies to me partially as well. I mean I read and not just books but god forbid comics too. I also scored well on the SATs and ACTs. But I didn't like school, especially high school. The number of days I missed is epic. I was called into Newton Highschool to discuss my attendance issues even though I had a 3.9 GPA. The principal said "You just need to be here and you if you don't come it is going to be the same when you get a job". Not at all true a job pays me money you give me shit and are just bitter that a 10th grader uses words you don't know. I used the word caveat, it looked like he had an anyerusym. Then in Saranac Lake the same thing with another visit to the prinicipal. The best he could do was to tell me that it reflected poorly upon me. In total I missed over 100 days of school my final 2 years. I did catch up on alot of sleep. I also don't whack it to Steve Jobs' picture.

Engineers are Cheap. This one is a resounding yes for me. I am very very cheap. Mostly with myself. The laptop I am typing this on is over 7 years old and refurbished. The screen can no longer support its own weight so for over a year I typed with one hand (que masterbation jokes). Instead of purchasing a new laptop I decided to build a PVC bracket to support the screen. I'm not sure what is more sad, that I take the laptop apart to lube the fan or that I was really proud when the bracket worked (fuck you all its awesome and cost like 2.57). I also shop whereever is cheapest and will wear anything that fits and doesn't make me look flamboyantly gay (ie purple sweat pants *breaks into a cold sweat*) or a hobo (again purple sweat pants).

Those are the only stereotypes that I know for engineers that I can say truly fit me. Engineers aren't supposed to be able to write and I think this blog proves that I can put down my thoughts at least semi coherently. Is being a chronic masterbater an engineering stereotype... it is? OK damn.